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Jan/Feb 2008 Issue
Generations of Faith
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On
Sunday evenings, 11-year-old Miles Murphy IV lights
a candle to set the mood as his parents, brother and
sisters gather around a table to say the rosary. The
children add their special intentions - for the soldiers
in Iraq, the poor and the homeless, for everybody in
the world to love God. |
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After they finish reciting the traditional
prayer, they talk about the week ahead and read a Bible story.
"It's a good way to end the week and start the week," says
Lauren Murphy, 17, a senior at Catholic Central High School
and older sister to Miles IV, Molly, 14, and Eric, 6. It's
no accident that these young people know and love their Catholic
faith. Faith and a commitment to serving others have been
passed down to them like a torch from generation to generation.
Faith is an integral part of the fabric of
this Irish Catholic family, helping earlier generations though
good and bad times: the difficult passage from Ireland to
the United States more than a century ago, the premature death
of spouses, the Depression and World War II, and the pull
of a culture that often clashes with Christian values.
Throughout the years, the family's faith has
been a "common thread," said Patrick Murphy, a Grand Rapids
attorney and great-uncle to Miles and his siblings. "They
didn't talk about it much," he said of his parents and grandparents.
"They lived it in their daily lives and in their actions….
They were all good Catholics."
The Murphy family's ancestors immigrated to
the United States in the late 1800s. Mary Henry came here
at age 16 from Ireland in 1888 as a "domestic" in search of
a better life. She met Dan Farrell, who worked on the railroad.
They were married at the Cathedral of Saint Andrew in 1898
and had eight children including Catherine Farrell. Catherine
and her siblings went to St. Andrew Catholic School, in Grand
Rapids, and Catherine went on to study nursing at Mercy Central
School of Nursing at St. Mary's Hospital in Grand Rapids.
There she would meet Miles Murphy, a young physician born
in 1900 who had come from a farm family in Mt. Morris.
Murphy's mother Mary had died in childbirth
when he was four, so he and his seven siblings were raised
by his father, Nicholas Murphy, and a tight-knit group of
aunts and uncles. Nicholas Murphy stressed the values of faith,
getting a good education and owning one's own property, family
members recall. His son Miles and his siblings all earned
college degrees. And they carried on their faith. "I think
their religion was probably strengthened by their family ties,"
said Dr. Miles Murphy II. "You probably didn't dare go (astray)
and if you did they'd pull you back in." Miles Murphy Sr.
and Catherine Farrell were married at the Cathedral of Saint
Andrew in 1933. They would have five children: Miles II, Kathleen,
Frank, Carmelita and Patrick, who are now in their 60s and
70s. When Miles II was a high school senior and Patrick 6
years old, their father died of acute leukemia at age 52.
Catherine's faith helped her weather the loss.
"I think our mother's faith really came into
play," recalls Miles II, a retired obstetrician. "She instilled
a strong faith in us as we continued to grow." Their mother's
faith had most likely been deepened by living through the
Depression and World War II, says Sister Carmelita Murphy,
a Grand Rapids Dominican. "I think Mom's faith was probably
forged through all that. By the time she became widowed with
five young children, I think her faith was very central in
her life." The Murphy siblings' memories of both parents remain
vivid.
Father Frank Murphy, a priest in the Gaylord
Diocese, recalls tagging along with his father on house calls
and the way his father would provide free medical care to
nuns and those who could not afford to pay. Their mother sent
them from their southeast Grand Rapids home to nearby Our
Lady of Sorrows Church for confession every two weeks. They'd
attend Mass on Sundays, pray the stations of the cross during
Lent, and all five attended Catholic schools.
It's no accident that the children would grow
up to enter professions - as a nun, a priest, a lawyer, a
doctor and an educator - in which they would serve others,
says Sister Carmelita. Their mother always emphasized "that
we've been blessed and we're fortunate and you have a responsibility
to give that back," recalls Sister Carmelita.
Not just a Sunday religion
His father's example led Miles II to become a doctor.
Before going on to medical school, Miles II studied at Grand
Rapids Junior College, where he met his future wife, Judy
McMahon, during a chemistry lab. Judy's family also had strong
Catholic roots. Born and raised in Lowell, she remembers her
Parnell-born grandfather Frank McMahon cramming grandkids
into the car and taking them to churches to sell tickets to
the chicken dinner at St. Mary's in Lowell. "On Good Friday
he would say a thousand Hail Marys," recalls Judy. "He was
a wonderful example." So were Judy's parents, Byrne McMahon,
who died in 1969, and Helen McMahon, a teacher and "handson
grandma," who died in 2000. Likewise, Miles II and Judy have
set an example for their six now-grown children. "One of the
things Miles and Judy have done very well in their marriage
and parenting was that they set expectations for their children,"
says Sister Carmelita. "I think teenagers are just inundated
with the dominant cultural challenges. And I think Miles and
Judy in the grace of parenting kept some safe boundaries …
yet those boundaries were permeable enough so that the kids
could stretch."
The Murphys sent their children to Catholic
schools and they attended Mass weekly. There were times their
teenagers missed the car and had to walk to church or showed
up with wet hair - but they always made it. At home, Judy
"kept a lot of reading materials in the house and set a good
example so that it wasn't just a Sunday religion," recalls
Miles II, describing that combination as "good home-cooking
for their brains and their faiths." They also set an example
of service for their children. Now retired, as a physician
Miles II was active in helping defeat a proposal that would
have liberalized abortion laws in Michigan before Roe v Wade.
He was instrumental in starting HELP Pregnancy Crisis Aid
to assist pregnant women and remains a member of the American
College of OBGyn Pro-Life Physicians. Judy tutored at her
children's schools and also at St. John's Home when her children
were younger.
'A torch to pass along'
Miles III, the oldest of Miles II and Judy's six grown children,
said his parents set a "great example" as they instilled the
Catholic faith, an example now being shared with their 19
grandchildren as well. "Growing up I
remember that (faith) was always the fabric of our upbringing,"
says Miles III, 47, an attorney. "The normal way to act was
as God would want you to act." That faith also was "driven
home" by both his Grandmother Catherine on his father's side
and Grandmother Helen on his mother's side.
"They had lots of struggles and wanted us
to grow up the right way," he recalls. Miles III said he also
feels grateful to have had the examples of his uncles and
aunts growing up, particularly Father Frank and Sister Carmelita.
High school sweethearts, Miles III and his wife, Cindy, met
at Catholic Central and have been married 22 years. Cindy,
too, comes from a strong Catholic family. Her mother, Rita
Manor, played organ at Immaculate Heart of Mary for many years
and her father was active in the Knights of Columbus. The
Murphys have set out to pass along the faith they've received
from their own parents and grandparents to their own children:
Lauren, Molly, Miles IV and Eric, who the family adopted as
an infant. In addition to saying the rosary on Sundays, the
family attends Sunday Mass weekly, says grace before meals
and participates in eucharistic adoration and reconciliation.
When Miles III drives the kids to school, they'll often say
a simple prayer in the car,
"Everything I do today is for God." For them
faith is an everyday thing, whether it's young Eric reading
his beloved Children's Bible or Miles IV helping his dad flip
pancakes at the K of C breakfast. "It's a very strong fabric
of our own everyday life," said Miles III, who sets out to
keep the children mindful of "how Jesus would want you to
act." "Miles and I keep reminding them that you can get through
anything if you're God-centered," Cindy added. They also emphasize
service, participating in clothing drives or volunteering
at DeGage Ministries. Just as their parents and grandparents
and great-grandparents before them, Miles III and Cindy see
faith as the greatest gift they can pass along to their children.
"There is almost nothing more important then helping the little
people who are still being molded," says Miles III. "I think
those little people are God's people. They need to have generational
guidance to move toward God. It's a torch to pass along."
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