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June 2007 Issue
Celibacy...
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When
the opportunity presents itself, I like to survey high-school
and college students about
what they feel would be the two greatest fears a young
man must overcome if he is to
consider priesthood today. Approximately two-thirds
of the students identify celibacy as
one of the fears. The other fears, including fear of
being unworthy, fear of unhappiness, fear of parents’
responses, and fear of friends’ responses, are
always far behind. With this in mind, I am trying to
develop a way of responding to this fear that might
help all people, the young and the not so young, understand
the nature of celibacy. |
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I realize I can’t immediately change the
whole culture toward a positive appreciation of priestly celibacy,
but I believe I can change at least some hearts, especially
those of young men who feel the call to priestly service.
For many people, celibacy simply means not being married,
not having sex and not having children. When viewed in this
way, a logical question is, “Why would anyone in their right
mind choose that for themselves?” Good question. Celibacy
cannot be defi ned only by a series of negations (no spouse,
no children, no sex) anymore than marriage can be defi ned
only by negation (no jealousy, no adultery, no selfi shness).
Marriage is much, much richer than that, and so is celibacy!
Celibacy, like marriage, is intended to be a way of loving.
The person who truly embraces celibacy recognizes a call to
love that goes beyond the unique and faithful love of husband
and wife. Celibacy is a choice to love all people without
exclusion. This kind of love is not easy, but it offers the
opportunity to become more like Christ, who gave his life
for the sake of many. Attitudes about sexuality in our contemporary
culture and the many misconceptions about celibacy people
have add to the fear common among young men considering the
priesthood.
They have met grumpy pastors and seemingly
dissatisfi ed priests, and they wonder if celibacy did this
to them. They look at their own families, and they wonder
if they could ever be happy without a wife and children of
their own. They have read about priests who have committed
serious sexual misconduct, and they hear people claim “celibacy
was the reason.” A man who wishes to embrace celibacy must
face not only the voices of fear within, but also the chorus
of voices from outside telling him that celibacy has lost
its meaning or that it isn’t normal. The truth is that celibacy
isn’t normal ... the norm is that the majority of people choose
a path of love within marriage.
However, this does not mean celibacy is abnormal
and therefore should not be reverenced and upheld as important.
Just as marriage witnesses to important aspects of God’s love
for us and the love we must have for each other, so celibacy
witnesses to important aspects of Christ’s presence among
us and the commitment each of us must have for the Kingdom
of God. Ultimately, celibacy helps the priest empty himself-not
so that he can be more available to people, but so that he
might be more available to God. Then fi lled with God’s grace
he might be capable of living and giving the loving service
to God’s people for which he was ordained.
- Father Ron Hutchinson is director of priestly
vocations for the Diocese of Grand Rapids.
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